Fear of the Unknown

It’s comical the kind of things you become anxious about when you’re a mother.  My daughter Peanut has been using a pacifier for nap time and bedtime since she was a newborn.  We all know too well how fast time flies; she turned two last month.  I thought to myself, “Should she still be using a pacifier? When do I take it away?”  She never used it while she’s awake, so I was never too concerned about it.  Recently I noticed that it was causing some rashes below her mouth when she would drool a lot. I figured it was time to take the pacifier away. I was dreading what kind of reaction this would produce from my Peanut; from what I could tell, she was pretty attached to it as a tool for falling asleep.

I began to have some anxious thoughts about this: Will she cry a lot, and if so, for how long (did I also mention she’s been a Drama Queen from Day 1?).  Will she be able to fall asleep? Will she be waking up in the middle of the night? Why did I not take it away sooner? It’s crazy how your mind can run so fast when it’s fueled by anxiety. 

Then we went to church last night and heard a message from Pastor Chris.  He talked about how to lose control of your own life and allow God to have control. He said we had to surrender our fears to God, and one of the fears he mentioned was “fear of the unknown.” That’s exactly what I had. He said we must commit to prayer and to obey God no matter what.  Lastly, he said we must trust God for the outcome and don’t take it (our trust) back. I looked up the Bible passage he shared from one of my favorite translations, the Message Bible. Isaiah 26:3 says, “People with their minds set on you, you keep completely whole, Steady on their feet, because they keep at it and don't quit. Depend on God and keep at it, because in the Lord God you have a sure thing.”

I decided today was the day. I was still a little anxious before her nap, but when we put her in the crib, I prayed over her.  I made a conscious effort to release my worry to God and to trust Him for the outcome. She asked once, “Bunky?” (that’s how she says “Binky”).  I told her she was not a baby anymore and to have a nice nap.  To my big surprise, she did not cry at all and fell asleep shortly (as I watched from her video monitor).  We had just put her to bed for the night as I type this, and again she seemed to have no trouble.  What a relief!

Today’s experience made me think of another passage from the Bible: You're at least decent to your own children. So don't you think the God who conceived you in love will be even better? (Matthew 7:11 The Message).  If I’m having such a hard time taking away something she likes and potentially making her sad, how much more does God hate to see us sad? Yet, like I had to do today, God does what’s best for us, not always what we think we want or need.  How much of a relief we can bring to God when we respond positively to the changes He brings our way, like Peanut did for me today.