Fresh Strength

I am almost too tired to type this right now. When I decided to expect God for the extraordinary this year, I'm not sure if I considered all the ways He would be stretching me in order to make this happen. I am exhausted physically: I've had very little sleep these last few nights, and my body is definitely feeling the consequence.  I am exhausted mentally: Peanut was sick over the weekend; as usual it was passed on to my husband and now he's sick. In addition, LittleBit's night time sleep is still unpredictable.  I am exhausted emotionally: I've had a lot of highs having my girlfriends from college here this past weekend, but a big bomb of tragic news was dropped on our family as soon as they left, which brought me to the opposite end of the emotional spectrum.  I am exhausted spiritually: I'm experiencing some major discouragement, and it's hard to see God's big picture and experience His joy and peace through this. All of this combined, I feel completely drained tonight, and I'm not sure if I can even think straight.
In times like this, I need to cling to truths I am sure about.
Isaiah 40:27-31 The Message: He's Creator of all you can see or imagine. He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired...
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind.
I definitely do not feel like an eagle right now. I don't feel energized. But I know that my choice is always to wait on God.  I decide to trust and follow Him everyday, and I know He will never fail me.
Matthew 11:28-30 The Message: Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and work with me - watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly.
The answer is not to get buried in this exhaustion, but to come to Jesus, to walk with Him, to work with Him, and to learn from Him.  I do not know how everything will play out.  I don't understand everything right now.  I'm feeling discouraged. I feel I don't have enough strength.  However, God's promise is truer and more powerful than what I'm feeling or what I'm capable of understanding.  He is the Creator of all things, and He does know everything...I don't. As long as I wait upon Him and make a conscious decision to trust Him in all this, He promises to give me fresh strength.
Lord, I need You. I trust You. I wait expectantly for Your fresh strength. I know I will not be disappointed.

Well I wrote the above post a few nights ago, and things got worse before they got better.  That night, not only was my husband sick, but I also caught Peanut's stomach bug (and later found out one of the friends visiting caught it as well). We were both up all night, and somehow I nursed LittleBit in the middle of it all too.  Wow, I don't know when was the last time I experienced such extreme physical condition...labor was nothing compared to what we went through that night! Having children also makes it harder to get the rest you need when you're sick.  We sure went through some crash courses on what parenting brings this past week.
However, I continued to wait on God for fresh strength. We did survive the night, and things slowly improved. Within a day or two, God completely turned around the tragic news I mentioned earlier. We are all healthy again (praise God!), and thanks to my husband cleaning, our house is not a big chaotic mess anymore. We are getting some normalcy back.
I remember one time I heard from our pastor that "Too hard is good," because that's when we rely the most on God's strength.  How true this was for me this past week.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 The Message: I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.